Friday 22 October 2004

Upcoming Open Day

Apparently next week is an open day for the school. This means that the parents of the children (just kindergarten I think) are allowed to sit in on the classes.

This is worryingly me deeply, as it means I'll have to change my teaching policy of the last nine months, which is "no clothes below the waist".

What it does mean, actually, is that the kids will probably be hyper well-behaved. Any time in the past when I've had someone else in the class, the kids miraculously sit quietly and listen.

Here are some other things I probably won't do when the parents are in the room:
- crack noisy kids hard on the skull with my marker pen
- get quickly restless in a quiet room of working children and start making silly noises or humming songs
- picking children up from their chairs and whirling them about, for no good reason
- demand absolute silence then pace about for a couple of minutes doing nothing but enjoying the peace
- messing about with my cassette recorder, making it do silly noises that the kids quickly tire of, but oddly I never do
- Simon Says "fight"

I may play my inordinately popular "Quiet" game. I like this game a lot, and so do the easily-manipulated children. The aim of the game is to remain quiet, and those who make a noise lose the game. Playing this game guarantees a good five minutes of determined silence.

I've only got about another 9 working weeks until finishing at my school forever. I've decided to join the British Army afterwards. Wait, that's not true, I'm probably going to take a leasurely holiday and find a new job,

Tomorrow, I'm meant to be going out with ex-teacher glam girl Jessy. She's really very attractive, so I'm going to be very pleasant and charming, and then ply her full of spirits till she's comprehensively plastered and send her into a whole new world of pain and regret.

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