Wednesday 31 March 2004

The School Toilets

I hate the school toilets. There are just two - male and female, obviously. They're crap. They're used by both staff and children alike. The urinals are ok, I suppose, but the actual toilets are just these damn awful squat/hole in the ground affairs, the likes of which give me shuddering memories about my time in Albania and the insect-infested campsite of Budva, Montenegro.

A proper toilet you can sit down on, relax, and let it all expel gently. A squat toilet means you've got to position yourself, aim and pray you don't cover your clothes in excrement. And being shared with tiny kids ensures that the toilets are far from sparkling. There's as much brown as there is white, often.

Also, the kids seem to find it quite intriguing if they catch me at the urinal. One time, little Mikey (currently with an eye patch to adjust his squint) was so fascinated in the white man next to him, that he made a grab for my cock.

So often I just make the trip back to my apartment, if I've got time. It may not have a deluxe bathroom, but at least it's not covered in crap and have small kids trying to grab my dick. And I can evacuate with the door open and music playing too.

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